It's 11 am and I have yet to eat, so if I'm a bit cranky, you can go ahead and sit on your hot mom's face.
1. A few people have notified me that the WNBA had a team in Cleveland called the Rockers because the city is home to the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame. Thank you. Now, here are my issues:
1a. You care too much about the WNBA. It is not fun to watch. If this is coming off as sexist, I don't know what to tell you. I'd rather watch women play volleyball, tennis, golf, softball, pool, and poker before I see them play basketball. They suck. 4 out of 5 feminists agree with the L Tray.
1b. The Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame belongs in Cleveland about as much as the True To Your Wife Hall of Fame belongs in Salt Lake City. Off the top of my head, here are some cities that would be better suited: Austin, Denver, Seattle, Chicago. Boom. I didn't even think. Cleveland sucks. But apparently it's home to the U.S.'s 2nd biggest fashion week behind NYC! So at least there's that!
2. Halo 3 is a great game. Nothing like a couple well placed headshots and plasma grenades to get you through the day. So, on to my story. One of my brother's friends(we'll call him "Mike") was doing his very best the other day during an intense session. He was really trying. You could see the effort, even if you couldn't see the results. We were all very proud. Then 'Maddness72' showed up.
It was immediately obvious that Maddness was either a female or 5 years old. After some subtle questioning, she was confirmed to be a lady. She kept saying things like "Wait, what's this game called?" and "If I keep playing this, you promise to buy me a pair of shoes?" She obviously had no clue what was going on. And then she killed 'Mike' 3 times. What a disaster. Afterwards, in tears, he promised nothing like that would ever happen again. Oh, but it will indeed happen again, for 'Mike' is without question the worst Halo gamer of all time.
3. Sam Zell, the horribly evil owner of the Tribune Company, is looking to sell the naming rights of Wrigley Field to the highest bidder. That's right. We could soon be watching a Cubs game at Eagleman Insurance Field. If, like me, you think this is a travesty, go to http://www.suntimes.com/sports/815403,zell022708.article and voice your thoughts. Short of throwing poop at Zell, this is the best thing you can do. Go! Do it now!
1. A few people have notified me that the WNBA had a team in Cleveland called the Rockers because the city is home to the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame. Thank you. Now, here are my issues:
1a. You care too much about the WNBA. It is not fun to watch. If this is coming off as sexist, I don't know what to tell you. I'd rather watch women play volleyball, tennis, golf, softball, pool, and poker before I see them play basketball. They suck. 4 out of 5 feminists agree with the L Tray.
1b. The Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame belongs in Cleveland about as much as the True To Your Wife Hall of Fame belongs in Salt Lake City. Off the top of my head, here are some cities that would be better suited: Austin, Denver, Seattle, Chicago. Boom. I didn't even think. Cleveland sucks. But apparently it's home to the U.S.'s 2nd biggest fashion week behind NYC! So at least there's that!
2. Halo 3 is a great game. Nothing like a couple well placed headshots and plasma grenades to get you through the day. So, on to my story. One of my brother's friends(we'll call him "Mike") was doing his very best the other day during an intense session. He was really trying. You could see the effort, even if you couldn't see the results. We were all very proud. Then 'Maddness72' showed up.
It was immediately obvious that Maddness was either a female or 5 years old. After some subtle questioning, she was confirmed to be a lady. She kept saying things like "Wait, what's this game called?" and "If I keep playing this, you promise to buy me a pair of shoes?" She obviously had no clue what was going on. And then she killed 'Mike' 3 times. What a disaster. Afterwards, in tears, he promised nothing like that would ever happen again. Oh, but it will indeed happen again, for 'Mike' is without question the worst Halo gamer of all time.
3. Sam Zell, the horribly evil owner of the Tribune Company, is looking to sell the naming rights of Wrigley Field to the highest bidder. That's right. We could soon be watching a Cubs game at Eagleman Insurance Field. If, like me, you think this is a travesty, go to http://www.suntimes.com/sports/815403,zell022708.article and voice your thoughts. Short of throwing poop at Zell, this is the best thing you can do. Go! Do it now!
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